Teen Relationships: What’s Influencing Them — For Parents

Raising teenagers today requires an awareness of the growing gap between what young people say they want, and how they actually think, behave and connect. This becomes apparent in their relationships; you can see how they communicate, what they expect, and how they treat themselves and others.

Unlike previous generations, teenagers are immersed in a society that emphasises identity, success and self-worth. They are being asked questions about who they are, how they measure up and where they fit, often during puberty, well before they have the maturity to properly understand themselves.

Online spaces are exploiting this uncertainty. Parts of the internet, including the manosphere, promote harmful, algorithm-driven messages about masculinity, identity and relationships. For some teenagers, this can feel appealing, offering a sense of belonging and certainty, but it also reinforces unhealthy ideas about power, respect and connection.

Alongside this, around 70% of under-18s report having seen online pornography, often from around age 12. What they are seeing is a highly performative and distorted version of sex, disconnected from emotional connection and real-life intimacy.

Taken together, these influences can widen the gap between what young people say they want, what they think is expected of them, and how they actually behave, often contributing to a growing disconnect between both sexes.

Drawing on real experiences and the RAP Foundation’s work with young people in schools, this session will explore what sits underneath these differences and how these pressures and influences are shaping how teenagers behave and respond.

We will talk about how parents can have conversations that keep communication open and build trust. The aim is to help teenagers develop a more realistic, balanced and emotionally grounded understanding of themselves and their relationships with peers and in romantic contexts.